LoveSac: WTF?

Tonight during my usual random website wanderings I found something kind of odd.

First, there’s the GamerSac. Dude’s chillin’ out on his super cool bean bag chair, drinking a beer and thinking he’s hot stuff because 1. he’s underage and 2. some hot chicks are standing in his doorway. Clearly, since there’s nowhere to sit, they’re there to tell him he’s got the volume turned up too high and they’re tired of having to listen to The Legend of Zelda through the thin walls of the dorm.

Go away, girls! I’m beating Ganon!

Next, we have the CitySac. So we’re really driving home the point that cool people who play lots of video games would love to have one of these chairs. And boy, does this guy look like a zombie he’s having fun. Sacs In The City sounds like the title of the world’s most boring p*rn.

I’m so glad college is over. The only time anyone interrupts me now is when Mom yells down that dinner’s ready.

So we move on to the PillowSac modeled by Blondie Longlegs, the girl next door. This version of the LoveSac is definitely not bachelor pad material, boys. It’s probably what the hotties from the GamerSac photo lounge on next door when they paint their toenails [and do other stuff]. It’s versatile, as our model demonstrates.

This one’s not for gaming.

Moving on. Next, we introduce the MovieSac. Doesn’t this girl look really happy to be falling off the side of the chair that her man is so obviously hogging? Perhaps the tagline should instead read “Seats 1.5 Movie-Lovers or One Large Chair-Hog”.

Notice that the world “comfortably” doesn’t appear in the description.

“What’s that, honey? I’m crowding you? Oh, all right, we can buy a bigger LoveSac. Let’s upgrade to the SuperSac!” That’s great and all, but he’s still a chair hog and she’s already a bit fed up.

“No seriously, get OFF me!”

“Are you happy now? We’ve upgraded to the BigOne. This is it, babe. There’s no upgrading after this one.”

“Hey, left nut!”   “Yeah, right nut?”

To which she responds through gritted teeth, “Why do you invite your idiot friend over every time we decide to hang out in our living room? Oh jeez; he just farted again and he thinks it’s funny. I hate my life. Thanks, LoveSac.”

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9 thoughts on “LoveSac: WTF?

  1. Jameson

    They totally could have put us in that GamerSac picture. Me and Dan getting caught loudly playing Donkey Konga by you — hands on hips — “do you boys NEED to clap so loudly? You’re 21 and banging on fake bongos for goshsakes!” 🙂

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    1. stocktoc

      …but for the picture to be complete, Wersonske must be standing outside the window mooning you guys (and, inadvertently, me too). What funny memories! I’d forgotten all about those bongos!

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    1. stocktoc

      Teri, Perhaps you should photograph your LoveSac and send the images in for the website. It sounds like you’d be more convincing than their current advertisement!

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  2. Tim

    They actually are quite comfortable. I tried some out at the store in Phoenix. But they’re expensive. And I love cuddling and all but Lauren and I are too tall for these chairs. Same with the couches. For the price, there are better and bigger couches. Like some Williams Sonoma couches. Now, on the other hand, if I was a bachelor, yea, I could see getting the gamer sac.

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    1. stocktoc

      Bahaha! If you were a bachelor, but of course! Because, as you can see from the website, the Gamersac causes young, attractive women to flock to you.

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      1. Tim

        But as you can see, they are still standing in the doorway because they have no place to sit. So just bad news all around.

        Like

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